Cruise is just around the corner!!

[KelliODonnell]

Hello all!!
Wow.
I am sitting outside enjoying the beautiful weather here and thinking it is only a short while before the alaska cruise. Gregg, Colleen, Jackie and I are quite busy getting everything in order for our first SOLD OUT sailing!!! We have many new passengers this year, so I hope you ole timers will help them out and show them the ropes. I am thrilled with our entertainment this year. Ro is hosting the broadway belters show and it is going to be insanely good. We also are expecting a few surprises (as usual) so get ready.

The Galapagos trip is also creeping around the corner. I am bringing Blake and Chelsea on that one and am thrilled about the intimacy and adventure of that trip.

And the big news is that we are finalizing our summer trip for next year. It will be 07/07/07. there is something funny about that. isnt 7 supposed to be a magical number? well if its not, then we will make it one. call our office if you want more details on that one.

I am off to watch the season finale of sopranos and big love. then start our crazy week at the office!!

kelli

[Alan & Ken]

Hello Kelly, thanks for the answer concerning Euan, a bit of disappointment; but I know from last years cruise the entertainment will still be WOW!!! I do have a question for you....I noticed that there will be a speaker on adoption once again on this cruise. Alan & I attended last years adoption lecture and were about abit let down when the speaker begin telling the audience the cost of adoption thru lawyers. Do you know if this years lecture will possible contain info on an adoption thru the foster care programs? Rosie oftens speaks on the number of children in our foster care system, but many of us don't know the proper way to handle it, especially if you're in one of the anti-gay states (Alabama). I applied here to go thru the home study over 2 months ago and haven't heard a word from any of the offices. Do you think it might be possible to have someone on the cruise to speak concerning this issue? Thanks, Ken and Alan

[cebii]

I applied here to go thru the home study over 2 months ago and haven't heard a word from any of the offices. Do you think it might be possible to have someone on the cruise to speak concerning this issue? Thanks, Ken and Alan

We've adopted several kids from foster care in Texas. I tried to get my partner to offer to speak about it, but she reminded me that the rules vary a lot from state to state. A two month wait may not mean anything bad - the wheels of state government can turn very slowly. Maybe a sort of forum could be set up where people could talk about their different experiences, positive and negative, rather than finding an expert.;)

[avibear]

I think a discussion forum where folks share their personal adoption and family building experiences is a great idea. It's great for folks to share in the variety of ways that families are formed and how different the experience can be from state to state, child to child, etc.
For example, our first son came to us after a long waiting process of over two years with one very painful interruption along the way - but it was sooo worth the wait --he is awesome. Our second son is our "miracle baby" in that his placement happened literally 10 days after we first decided to adopt a second child. So, as you can see, there is no exact formula. What was very helpful for us was sharing in the experiences of other families that went before us to help us maintain strength and hope along the way.

;)

[Alan & Ken]

Thanks cebii & avibear for your responses concerning Foster Care adoption...I would love to be a part of a forum, I have so many questions. I understand each state has different laws and guide lines, but I would have to believe that bases have to be the same. How to answer the questions, explaining another male in your house, filling out the questionaire..all that stuff. I have no clue what is involve or what to expect. Alabama is still very homophobic, many gays still live in the closet. There are not many people with who to discuss this issue, especially give advice. Would like to hear from hear from anyone about this issue!

[2DadsnAnaheim]

Hello All,

Regarding adoption through private or county foster agency's, every agency is different. We went through the Kinship Center here in Sunny Orange County, California. Our costs were around only $ 500.00, and that was just for the Fingerprints and background checks. Most county's or private agency's have 3 ways of adopting children, they are fee,no-fee, or baby and even international adoptions. Most county/private agency's will tell you up front on what fees that you are possibly looking at during the adoption process. We were told by our agency that there are numerous grants out there that one can get to help with any fees that one might encure with adoptions.

As to the Homestudy question, we found out that everything you go through from the inital intake with your social worker until the child is getting ready to be placed in your home is the what they consider the Homestudy process. This is at least what our agency told us. I also talked with friends who have gone through the county, and they have experienced the same as well.

I hope that this ansewers some of the questions aground the fees and what a Homestudy is.

I can't wait until Carribean Trip in February 2007 and to hopefully meet Rosie,Kelly,Gregg,Colleen and Jackie on the cruise.

[ourtribe]

HEY GUYS! :)
Craig and I adopted through foster care. Cheyenne was 15 mo old. We had asked for new born, healthy, boy...oh and that looks like us...in that order. LOL! Our social worker laughed and said she'd give us one of those on the list. Well, we did the foster care classes, got licienced ( background checks, etc...) Cheyenne wasn't our first placement. That experience of saying good bye to that first placement was heart breaking and yet also reassuring. We knew behond any doubts ... that we were meant to build a family. Seeing my partner as a Daddy was heart warming. It was an experience I had not even imagined...

The holidays are ALWAYS family filled and enjoyable. This time around however we knew the filling of having an emptiness in our heart. Mikie had been placed and then reunified with his family a month or so before Christmans. BUT, then it happened! It was a bright sunny, very cold winter day at the end of January Cheyenne was in our life. Dispite some rocky court hearing and alot of nail biting, the courts determined that she was to be a Ward of the State and eligable for adoption. The date was to be on Christmas Eve! What a present from GOD!

Cheyenne bio mother kept in touch with us. Six months had passed and she informed us she was to have another child. This time she wanted the child to be a private adoption to us - AT BIRTH! And Kody was born 03/18/2004. He was OUR newborn.

So in hindsight our social worker was wrong. We did get our list. OUR amazing family was made via a system that DOES work. There are some bumps and falls but it does eventually work. Our adoptions cost us $0.00 ! We are from Vermont and the experience here was nothing less then supportive, encouraging, and helpful.

Craig and I did civil union for the adoption of our first. We had been together at that time for 8yrs. The documentation on the kids Birth Certicates have us BOTH listed as the parents. :D

COME TO VERMONT!

James

(we have budgeted our first cruise for FEB. 2007 - can't wait to see some of you there:rolleyes:

[4TotalNearPSP]

Rosie oftens speaks on the number of children in our foster care system, but many of us don't know the proper way to handle it, especially if you're in one of the anti-gay states (Alabama). I applied here to go thru the home study over 2 months ago and haven't heard a word from any of the offices. Do you think it might be possible to have someone on the cruise to speak concerning this issue? Thanks, Ken and Alan

Not sure how it works in Alabama, but I would imagine there are children in need everywhere. In our area our case seemed to get pushed a bit because of the fact we wanted what the system calls "older children", and there was a need for that. We also were open to what they call risk (chance that children could be reunited with birth family). And we were open to siblings, and race. I think it also helped we had one stay at home parent.

If you are being very specific, which you can be, and should be if you have specific desires/abilities then you may find yourself lower on the list.

But I digress, while there may be reasons for a delay, I would recommend gentle persistence. Find out what is next? Is there anything else you can be doing (classes, applying for state license) in the meantime. Maybe you can find a foster parent group and start making contacts. While there may be matching "databases", and rules and policies and procedures, so much of it seemed to come down to personal relationships we developed during the process. Not everything went perfect with us, but my partner was so on top of everything, with every "i" dotted and "t" crossed it really helped.

He never let paperwork sit. Not on our desk, or our social workers.

We have been richly rewarded with a wonderful family. It was more than worth it.

We did have a few thousand dollars in out of pocket costs, but mostly due to fencing we had to install around a koi pond we have. And we got a 50% tax credit back from California, and there is a huge tax credit from the Feds that you get for adopting "special needs" (ie: siblings, age, race, medically fragile) even if you don't have expenses.

Don't give up. But if moving is feasible, you might want to consider California also (we will both be on birth certificate if the state ever gets it to us), as well as a decent Domestic Partners law.

[immikeymcc]

Every day we have the countdown at home, perhaps I should say multiple times a day we have the countdown. "Poppy, how many more days until we go on the boat".

I guess I should share my children's angst with you:

It's only 19 days until the cruise... Any chance of getting a full entertainment lineup? Is it posted somewhere and I've missed it?

[moms2threegirls]

I guess I should share my children's angst with you:

It's only 19 days until the cruise... Any chance of getting a full entertainment lineup? Is it posted somewhere and I've missed it?

We're a bunch of Broadway geeks in our house...and my kids have been dying to know the details of the entertainment as well! Luckily, we have some inside connections, so I was able to get a much more detailed list of entertainment than has been publicized to date.

But, I feel that there must be a reason that Kelli or Gregg have not posted this information on the public forum, so I don't feel comfortable doing so. If you are interested, feel free to send me a private message, and I'll tell you what we know. I will say that I haven't heard any "big names"...if you know much about Broadway, you will recognized lots of the talent. Otherwise, the headliners that are in the "Essential Information" book are the ones that most people will know - Gavin Creel, Audra McDonald, Kathy Griffin, Sharon Gless, etc.

[PAPAJIM]

Hi guys,
My patner and I adopted our son 4 years ago in Arizona from California. We now live in SW Colorado. We are in the final stages of recertification ( started in March.) for our second child. It seemed faster in Arizona. Which bears on the theme-it varies from state to state.
My suggestion: Talk to all of the parents you can on board, and ask their experiences. That way you and your partner can decide your best route. Also we parents love to talk about our kids! Best wishes to you both, see you on board.

[immikeymcc]

We also adopted our three kids (sibling group) from CA and live in VT. There were definitely trials and tribulation. Some yelling and screaming at a social worker or two in CA. But, it all worked out in the end and we're one big happy family now. Our kids came home nearly 3 years ago and the adoption was finalized two years ago in Aug. It couldn't have been too bad as we just started the process again! We're hoping for a little brother!

See ya in 18 days!

[swing dancin girls]

If you do put together an informal discussion forum, I would be willing to speak, if people would be interested in the information I have. I am an attorney in California. I no longer represent individual clients but instead I work for the state in advising the courts regarding juvenile law. While I don't have experience on becoming a foster parent, I have represented both parents and children who have active dependency cases in court (dependency cases are those that are brought to court because child protective services feels that the biological parents are unfit to care for their child or children; if the parents fail to resolve the problems that brought them to court, then their children can ultimately be freed for adoption). If you become foster parents to a child who has a dependency case, I can explain what to expect in terms of what the issues are with whether or not a judge would reunify the child with his or her bio parents, the timelines that you can expect reunification or the termination of parental rights to happen, as well as ways that you as a caregiver can ask for your opinion to be heard in court. Because the federal government dictactes much of what happens in terms of timelines and issues for the courts to address, there is a lot of uniformity between the states on these issues.

If people think that this would be valuable information to have, please let me know so I can keep an eye out for any discussion that is organized.

[lisep]

No, you don't have to be a stay at home parent. You would have to take into account the child's transition from one home to another depending on their age and take some time from work just as you would if you had your own.

[Alan & Ken]

Good Morning, I see there has been discussion about Foster Care adoption since I first made my posts on June 4. Today I have emailed Kelly asking if there was anyway to have an informal discussion on the ship about this topic. I see from the posts that each state operates different about adoption, but has anyone adopted thru Foster Care in state that is similiar to Alabama, a very anti-gay state? Thanks, Ken and Alan